Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Let's see if I'm smarter than the average bear ...

Happy Wednesday!!!

Man - this long weekend has really thrown me off - I can't believe tomorrow is Thursday!!!

Today was an interesting day.  My lovely little pussycat brought a lovely little present into my house ... and then let him go.  Yep - when I saw him sitting and starting at the bottom of the stove I figured he had a mouse ... but there wasn't a large enough space for a mouse so I was VERY hopeful it was just a grasshopper.  Even the dog got into the act of keeping vigil to see what emerged from the depths of *behind the stove* .... (insert creepy *da, da, daaaaaaa* music here ...)
... and we wait ...
I was completely creeped out but couldn't stand around staring at a stove all day so I *went in* ... picture the scene ... me in my housecoat looking ravishing as ever ... with an oven mitt on one hand and a pancake spatula in the other, making a scrunchy face ... I sloooooowly opened the drawer under the oven door .... slooooooowly ... I peeked into the darkness (swatted the cat with the spatula to get the hell out of the way!!) and saw ....................... MY MINI MUFFIN TIN - YAY!  I was WONDERING where that thing went!!!
Right!  I had to focus ... the beast could lunge at me at any moment ... but all I could focus on was all the greasy build up on the stove drawer that I never noticed before!  Note to self:  get some grease cutting cleaner and clean the stove drawer tomorrow.  Again:
Right!  Possible mouse in the house - gotta stay calm and develop a plan.  I looked at the cat.  He looked at me.  I looked at the dog.  He looked at the cat.  The cat looked at the dog.  The dog looked at me.  I laughed and walked away.  The cat went to take a nap and the dog went to hump his bed.  Yep.  This is exactly the life I imagined 25 years ago while working my way through University.  This is it.  I have arrived.  Ya.  Right.  Livin' the dream, Tam - Livin' the dream.

So!  I carried on with my morning chores hoping beyond hope that the mouse was really just a grasshopper and I wouldn't actually be eaten alive in my sleep by a vicous rodent later tonight.  About an hour later I hear a mighty racket coming from the laundry room.  It was the cat.  Oh Dear Lord.  I suspect my grasshopper is a mouse.  I went to investigate, spatula in hand.  There I find Charlie up to his armpit (assuming cats have armpits ... DO cat's have armpits?  Are they CALLED armpits?  No - that would be silly ... they don't have arms ... they have four legs!)  Right!  So I find Charlie up to his legpit (well that just sounds RUDE!)
... up to his legpit trying to get *smething* from beside the washer and dryer.  Sigh.  OK - I'm *goin' in*.  I remove some posterboard from beside the washer to get a better look ... EEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!  Something scurried!!!!!!!!! .... or did it ... MAN there are a lot of dust bunnies beside my washer ... when was the last time I cleaned back there?  HAAAAAAAAAAAA!  Let's be serious, shall we - I've never CLEANED back there!!!  When was the last time CRAIG cleaned back there??  (yes, HE is the one who does the deep cleaning around here ... not Pampered Princess!)  Apparently it's been while because I can't tell if I just saw a large rodent or a large dust bunny scurry.  Worrying.  OK.  I bow calmly call Craig and tell him he has to come home now.  He laughs at me.  Humph.  I grab Charlie (yell at him for bringing live *friends* into the house and then letting them go!!), watch him stare at the washing machine for a while ... watch the dog get in on the action ... grab a flashlight to see if I can see anything back there ... can't see anything.  THIS is boring ... so I grab the dog, leave the cat, close the door to the laundry room, block the door crack with a towel and go eat lunch.  Much more fun.  An hour later I look to see if there are mouse guts anywhere but there aren't.  The only change is that Charlie has knocked over the shoe rack.  Idiot cat.

Having had enough of this I take the girls and go shopping only to return after Craig is home from work.  He is hunting for the mouse.  He confirms there IS a mouse because there is mouse poop all over the laundry room.  Fabulous.  I leave him to it and go start dinner.  10 minutes later I hear him yell "I need a glove!!!!"  Yes, the rodent HAS been spotted!  I try to find a glove ... at which point Craig is now yelling "CLOSE THE DOOR, CLOSE THE DOOR!" ... the children are shrieking, the dog is in the way, I'm trying to close the door - all hell has broken loose!  I slam the door shut and a minute later Craig emerges ... victorious ...
My hero xoxo
My hero!!!  Yes - it appears this not-so-little guy is a vole, not a mouse.  Either way - EEEEEWWWWW!!!  Craig takes him outside and shows him to Charlie who promptly ignores it and it excapes under the deck.  Well done Charlie - well done.  Craig is ready to have Charlie stuffed and mounted with a plaque reading "World's Most Useless Cat".

So that was MY day!  Yep - rarely a dull moment around our house!

Oh - FYI, no, I don't actually have a project to share with you today.  Were you even LISTENING??  I didn't have time to craft today.  I'm actually doing a test drive to see if I'm smarter than your average bear ... I'm seeing if this post will automatically feed in my Stampin' Up! Business Website ... the one with my on-line store and calendar of events (  There is a blog feature on that site ... but I like THIS blog ... and this blog name ... but I also want one-stop-shopping through my other site ... SO ... I'm trying to get posts from HERE to automatically post THERE so that both sites are updated at the same time without any extra work.  Clever, yes?  Yep - that's me!  Now ... if I can only be smart enough to close and lock the screen door so the stupid cat doesn't bring vermin into my house!!

Until next time ... have a stampy night!




  1. Lord have mercy your funny! Forget the project this was well worth reading. LOL By the way, the vole is adorable!

    1. *lol*. It always seems a lot funnier AFTER the event than during!! ... And yes ... he is cute .... But no, we can't keep him!

  2. Loved reading about your antics! Love your sense of humour.
    I 'saw' it all unfold thanks to your witty banter. You could write a book! x

    1. *lol*. Thanks Vivienne ... It was definitely *one* of those days!! ... and as you can see, if you do t have a sense of humour around here you would likely go stark raving mad!! *lol*
      Thanks for your comment ... Have a stampy day!